Secret of the human soul

Do you ever give a gift and the reaction doesn't seem to be what you had hoped it would be?

Do you ever hear that someone you love dearly just doesn't feel loved even though you express it to them a lot and it puzzles you?

Do you ever speak words to encourage people only to have them push them away?

Do you ever give hugs or touch someone to let them know you care, but for some reason it doesn't seem to be received well or even help them feel any better?

Do you try to show love and support to someone by helping them with things in their daily lives but they still don't seem to recognize that you are doing it because you care?

I read a great book a few years ago called the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman and it spoke to me.

The human soul's deepest longing is to feel loved and accepted for who they are, yet some try to express it to them but they just don't feel it. Why?

Because each of us speaks a different language of love that touches us in our deepest parts. If it isn't being offered to us in the way we recognize it, then we won't identify it when others are extending their love language to us which might be completely different than our own.

God told me a secret today. If I want to know how to make others feel loved, I need to observe how they love others. How they reach out and give of themselves. It will speak volumes to me what they are deeply longing for in their own souls without even having to ask. It might not be in the same way I do, but it is still very meaningful to them. By their expression of giving love, it is also an educator to outsiders of their own soul. They show what touches them the most. Even if it might not be in the same way we give love or want to receive love, it doesn't mean we can't learn another way for other people to feel love from us and do our best to educate others about ourselves if they are willing to 'listen'. The one's worth investing ourselves in are the one's who will listen.  Listen by observing what we do. Taking an interest in those things and acting upon them. I think the book is great to get our primary love languages in order, but we can be combinations of languages. The best way to learn isn't necessarily from a book or taking a quiz, its taking an active interest in observing other's speaking their love language. But to do that, we must be willing to set aside our own way of loving by actively observing other's instead of only thinking how 'we' would feel loved. That is a true act of service.  That is true unconditional love. :)


*I am adding on to this because a friend also reminded me that some are incapable of loving others due to emotional damage so it might make observing others difficult. So, I would think the best way to deal with these people would be to experiment with all the different types of love languages which actually can be found in the book, and try them all out to see which one's they respond to the most. Something will melt their heart eventually.

Here are the 5...you can do your own research after this...

Words of affirmation
Physical Touch
Quality Time
Gifts
Acts of service

Life is today, not in tomorrow.

God never ceases to amaze me when He speaks to me so clearly.

I usually post lessons from God on my Facebook page when He speaks to me. Then there are days like today when a limited post isn't enough to share all I have learned.

I take daily walks and that is my special time when I am in communion with Him. It starts out with me talking about what is currently happening in my life, how I feel about it, my concerns, my fears, my hopes, my disappointments and my hurts. There are some days when I just want to escape from what might be happening in the here and now and I was thinking about those times when sharing my heart with God. Its a matter of waiting for the future to happen. Then the message came clear to me.....

"Life is today. It is right now. Its all you have. Don't wait for tomorrow's hopes, dreams, desires, or even planned events that may never actually come.  It will rob you of life, which is always today in the here and now and there are so many gifts to experience in the moment.  Come out of yourself and experience life, and that more abundantly as I have promised you. You don't know what tomorrow may bring."

Then it happened...my senses awakened. Its like my surroundings lit up and came alive. God has been reminding me a lot recently to look around me and appreciate what I see and experience. Today it was even more prominent.

I walked by some trees that had the most incredible shade of cranberry leaves and all I could say was..."Wow" out loud. I noticed how intensely blue the sky was. The colors and different hues around me became brilliant. I saw lavender flowers and golden leaves with touches of oranges, browns and reds. Saddleback mountain was so clear as the backdrop of this beautiful scene.

I heard splashing and looked over the ledge and saw a girl down in the creek letting her dog run loose fetching sticks and bouncing around searching for fish and obviously experiencing their nudges..Ha ha! So cute! I noticed this all happening from a distance before I approached it, but what impressed me most was how the water captured the light of the sun and created the most incredible shade of a neon aqua with sparkling starbursts of light, almost like diamonds dancing on top of the water, as the dog splashed. I also walked by a couple of ladies stopped on the path....one was holding her dog on the leash and the other was crouched down looking at something in the bushes. When I got closer, I saw they were trying to lure a grey cat over to them who seemed to be enjoying its time exploring much more.

I also focused on the things I was hearing....The babbling brook just over the ledge of the path I walk on was so soothing..  The croaks of the frogs also made me feel like I was in the Bayou somewhere. The trees were rustling and leaves were crackling as the one's that fell moved across the pavement in the breeze. I always seem to have butterfly companions every time I am walking too, rain or shine. Several orange and black monarch butterflies and a few white ones who can do nothing but bring a sense of tranquility in their gentleness keep me company while I walk.

I encounter bicyclists on the path daily in their bright colors of their biking wear and helmets. Its so wonderful to see their smiles and to greet one another and think about what each of their lives must be like. There are others that walk who seem so melancholy. I always offer a smile and a greeting but also feel prompted to say a little prayer for them not knowing where their thoughts are in that moment. I even received a text on my walk today from a friend who expressed that they have been having some life challenges which brought upon me a sense of compassion. Yes, life in the moment is a beautiful thing.

Upon approaching the last legs of my walk today, I even enjoyed a bit of comedy. First, I noticed the "Halloween House" that I posted in a photo album on my Facebook, with its outrageously overdone decor was being transformed into a crazy Christmas commercial monstrosity. These people are serious! A bit further down, I looked up and noticed two different pairs of tennis shoes that have been thrown over the power lines hanging by their tied together shoe laces over by my apartment complex that have been there for months and months and months...Ha ha! It makes me laugh every time I see them imagining what the scenario must have been like. I would assume it included some very rambunctious teenagers. :) Coming back into my complex I could smell Thanksgiving leftovers being reheated by some of my neighbors which made for a delicious smelling aroma.

Before walking up the stairs I thanked God for such a wonderful experience today on my walk. I felt alive and felt like my life is full. I have struggled with many challenges in this past year, but there is still good in the every day moments of life. I feel so grateful. To really feel happy, I realize its a matter of slowing down, coming out of myself and living and experiencing the moment, experiencing people, experiencing the things we take for granted and miss when its right under our noses for us to enjoy every day. There is always something.

I believe loneliness is when we are buried inside our own thoughts and can only see what seems to be our heavy burdens and miss out on so much wonder..

We can enrich our daily lives by simply conversing with a stranger, listenting to a friend, and trying something completely new.

It is my vow to take the time to appreciate this life, each day, that God has so graciously given me. To love people with His unconditional love and to thank God for all His wonderful gifts and lessons and infinite wisdom that can be tapped into with a simple request of insight and healthy perspective.

Thank you God for life TODAY.

Amen :)

Words I meditate on. Words I live by. Words of life. ♥

I used to know these words but didn't 100% commit to them and put them in to actual practice. Ever since I have, it has been changing my heart and mind and soul. I'm a believer. :) There are more, and when they come to mind, this 'note' will be added on to. 

Ephesians 4:29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

1 Thessalonians 5: 11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.

Hebrews 10:24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds

Acts 13:15 Brothers, if you have a message of encouragement for the people, please speak.

James 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry

Matthew 5:44 But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

1 Timothy 2:1 First of all, then, I urge that supplications, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be made for all people

1 Corinthians 13:13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Philippians 2:3-4 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.

Philippians 2:14-15 Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world

Romans 12:16 Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation.

Proverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.

Psalm 101:3 I will set before my eyes no vile thing. The deeds of faithless men I hate; they will not cling to me.

Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

Colossians 4:6 Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.

Proverbs 15:4 A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, But perverseness in it breaks the spirit. 

Romans 12:3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you.

Ecclesiasties 7:16 Do not be overrighteous, neither be overwise--why destroy yourself?

Proverbs 11:22 Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.

Matthew 7:24 Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.

2 Corinthians 10:3-5  For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does.  The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds.  We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Proverbs 24:17 Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice,

1 Corinthians 13:4-7  Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not  self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Romans 12:12 Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

Romans 5:3 More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance,

James 1:2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds

1 Peter 4:12 Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

James 1:2-8 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. 

And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. ...

Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

Acts 20:35 In all things I have shown you that by working hard in this way we must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive

Matthew 23:11 The greatest among you shall be your servant.

Luke 6:38 Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.

Proverbs 11:25 Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered.

Romans 12:9-13 Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality.

2 Timothy 2:23 Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels.

Matthew 5:14-16 You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl.

Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

James 3:17-18  But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.  Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.

Galatians 6:9 Let us not lose heart in doing good.

James 3:17-18 For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there is disorder and every evil thing.  But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, reasonable, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without hypocrisy.  And the seed whose fruit is righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

Colossians 3:12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.

Ephesians 4:32  Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.

Luke 6:38 Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

Romans 12:17-21  Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.  Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”says the Lord.  On the contrary:

   “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; 

   if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. 

In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.



Psalm 1 v 1-3 Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, or stand in the way of sinners, or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night. He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season, and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers. 

Goody Two Shoes

All my life I've been associated with the label.."goody two shoes" or "goody goody".

For many years it seemed to come to me in a negative fashion as though there was something wrong with wanting to be a good girl. It hurt my feelings. I was teased and at times ostracized for it because it would seem that I was "no fun" because of it. It took its toll on my self-esteem and I ended up disliking myself because of it.

As I got older, there would still be occasional comments, or being left out of certain activities, but it didn't bother me like it did when I was younger.

I took an internal inventory of my heart to ask it, what are the things I like? What brings me joy? What do I want to spend my time talking about with others or filling my mind and soul with?

I realized I was the happiest when I was a child and loved the light-hearted innocent things. When I would seemingly try to compromise myself and engage in the talk that didn't seem as wholesome or place myself in an atmosphere that was less than pure, I wasn't happy. It wasn't fun to me. I realized I didn't want to be around it, so why try to be accepted in the atmosphere I didn't want to be in? I wasn't upset with the people, we were just different. I like being in an atmosphere that is uplifting and encouraging and filled with light and love and caring for others. I love being around beauty of all sorts.

The more I have learned about God and His word, the more I see that this is what He teaches me to be. He promises it will bring me joy. It certainly does. :) It might not match up much with today's society, but I don't care much for the way society has evolved anyway, so I am fine with being different in this aspect.

I like being a goody two shoes. It makes me happy. :D And I'm fine with those who might not want to be around me because of it. I have no intention to criticize anyone who feels differently than me but I'm also not going to apologize for being the way I am even if others think I might be judging them. I'm not. This is a blog of self-acceptance, not a critique of other's behaviors.

 I really like who God has made me on the inside. :) Thanks God! ♥